Beautiful words from B

B whatever happens in life or how tough it’s going to be. Pls don give up on me for I also won’t give up on u

I’m really lucky… Picking up a gem.

Yet another……..

this week, I aim to procrastinate lesser, work harder,snooze for a shorter time

I wanna wake up early for the kids still struggling with the damn long division. (argh for them)

I wanna be more efficient which means staying in class during recess to clear their work.

I wanna be more patient to the kiddos who are really pulling my hair at times…

I wanna I wanna…….. do so many things..
but out of the 5 work days, will be on course for 3 freak days again.

God, this coming week, I need a few more onces of positivity.
Help me.

Despondent

Have been feeling  so moody lately.. why oh why and i can’t seem to tell why..

Could be Ah Gong’s ailing’s state…Could be the never ending work.. could be the so many things on my mind…

I feel that I have so much to say, but don’t know where to start..

There is nothing more dreadful than the habit of doubt. Doubt separates people. It is a poison that disintegrates friendships and breaks up pleasant relations. It is a thorn that irritates and hurts; it is a sword that kills.

All that sadness does is that it begets more sadness. The powerful works of the mind. Pls let the chirpy xian come back to life.

Xz was saying sometimes she doesn’t understand what’s the point of working so hard cos we might just die anytime and that’s it.

Likewise, what’s the point, taking tut, slogging like heLL and realise that at the end of the day I achieve nothing.

My vision is so blurred.

I’m not handling sch well, parents complaining, never meeting deadlines, work is never good enough, the level children is the worst amongst the lot.

To make things worst, I can’t multitask for nuts sake. I really wanna strike a balance devoting equal time for different people and I can’t seem to get it right. Ever.

In the family, besides being that slight financial support, I dunno what I’m useful for, really.

I have really tried to be upbeat about things. I have really tried.
But it just isn’t enough. There is so much to grapple with and I dunno what to focus..

Usually…
I crash and I learn and I crash.
But now…I’m really at my wits end.

As directionless as my entry.
I’m directionless.

Sad Life

Sometimes… I feel that I have a sad, sad life.. So plagued with work.

Sometimes I just wanna dump everything and just enjoy but reality doesn’t allow. Was telling a colleague I went to Sentosa during the term break and the reaction was as if I sinned.

I always ask myself if I’m gonna die working..

Perhaps..

Why?

Just wondering why am I working so hard, without day and without night…The best thing is.. I still can’t finish my work.

I’ve literally spent so much time on work and by the time I’m home Ah Gong and Ah Ma is asleep.. My mum and dad had already retreated back to their room.. Even when they’re not asleep, I’m too tired to talk.

Can someone tell me how to balance work and life or if there is such a thing still?

Miss Self-Centered

WordPress is so screwed recently, posted this on Sunday actually :/

I have never thought so… until today.. until B walked out.. until we had that argument and only then I realised….

I’m really quite a self-centered person all along…. :’(

Little did I know all I cared about was…

What I felt..

How my day was..

How busy I am..

How stressed that I am..

and I forgot all about YOU.

The silly boy is to magnanimous, he always apologises and give hugs although I am always in the wrong..

B ar B, please remind me if I fail to be the girlfriend i’m supposed to be..